Spellbound ~ #fridayfictioneers ~ 5/2/14

Copyright Renee Heath

Copyright Renee Heath

 

Spellbound

“What the hell is that?”

Ages since I’d visited Trish’s Studio, I was sure she’d tell me the melted wax was some photography experiment- working on the play of light and perspective. It just looked like a fire hazard. My mom in my head, “Young lady you never fall asleep with a lit candle. It’s a recipe for disaster.”

“You don’t recognize it?” her Cheshire grin rising to the surface.

“Is that the love incantation candle you dragged me into the French Quarter for?” What a night that had been, “The night you met Eduardo.”

“Yep, still burning ” she winked.

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13 thoughts on “Spellbound ~ #fridayfictioneers ~ 5/2/14

  1. I’m a sucker for anything New Orleans… so a love incantation candle from the French Quarter wins my vote! Janet’s suggestions are good (she nails me every week!), but I really enjoyed the story as is, too, Dana. 🙂

  2. I like the story and especially the part about it just looking like a fire hazard and her mom’s voice in her head. That seemed very real and down-to-earth. And the last line works perfectly.

    This doesn’t work as well for me: “Ages since I’d visited Trish’s Studio, I was sure she’d tell me…” It seems like the first part needs to be its own sentence and then something like “It had been ages…” Then here, “What a night that had been, “The night you met Eduardo.”–What a night that had been! “The night you met Eduardo?” I think it would sound even better if you put the two quote together and then ended with “What a night that had been!”

    Just my $.02 worth. 🙂

    janet

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