Friday Fictioneers is here! My favorite midweek distraction. If you interested check out Rochelle’s website for instructions. But be forewarned, it’s addictive.
Mad Dogs and Englishmen
Survivor’s guilt they called it, whatever that’s supposed to mean. Each morning I walk the deserted beach, feel the sand spread between my toes, a cool breeze on my visage. I strip and dive into the sweet salty brine, folding into myself, slipping deeper, water washing over my bare skin, bald as the day I was born, baptized anew.
Starring at the little shack before me I freeze. Memories flood. Time stops. Surely it’s a hallucination, residual effect from treatment- How else could the cabin where we whispered our vows appear before me on the opposite side of the globe?
Word Count: 100
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P.S. Please make sure to read the others.
DCTdesigns Creative Canvas 
The mind is a powerful hallucinogen.
Indeed it is. Hallucination and twilight zone both side of the worm hole.
I love the way you describe the swim.– especially “folding into myself” great description and intrigue. 😀
Thanks Linda- The water has always been my escape and release. Where I find myself best.
I have always love the water too. I think that’s why I loved this so much.
Dear Dana,
Wow. Fascinating story. A little Bradbury-ish I’d say. A couple of places there seemed to be some tense confusion. For the most part it’s present tense…in keeping with that, you might consider changing “froze” to “freeze” and “whatever that was supposed…” to “whatever that’s supposed to…”
Just suggestions. Aside from that. Really good one.
shalom,
Rochelle
Thanks Rochelle- I kept switching back and forth between tenses and obviously did not land on one or the other. I suspect my voice was as confused on this one as my narrator. 🙂 Thanks for the suggestions. I’ll rework.
Sometimes your troubles follow you no matter where you go. Such a tight little tale.
Yes, when it comes to trouble you can run but you can’t hide. Thanks Joe
Good writing, darling. I could feel the melancholy dripping off the words. The ending would have me holding my head, fearing I was losing my mind. Excellent portrait of the madness of grief.
That’s the conundrum. Are you losing your mind or transferring to another reality of awareness? Forget it I don’t even know what I’m babbling about today. Healing is a strange process.
very chilling. a mysterious and intriguing ending.
Thanks KZ
Very interesting story. Perhaps the hallucination is the effect of the noonday sun on the lovesick, mad Englishman (or Englishwoman)….
Definitely the noon day sign and perhaps too many pints.
Very good, a great take on the prompt.
Thanks Sandra
I can hear “Twilight Zone” music in my head right now!
janet
dee-doo-di-doo-dee-doo-di-doo. Crazy right?